seperate for time being

we seperate..
seperate for time being..

he didnt use the word "break".
maybe this word is just way too cruel or hurting.
neither did i..

i knew he had hard time thinking and thinking.
it really took a lot of courage and time for he to said this word when he still love me.
i love him too.

he had his difficultities.
i understand..
i let it go..
he told me loving each other doesnt mean to be together.
maybe staying as friend will be much better for each other...

i know one of the big stone in his heart had removed.
both of us relieved, because we clear what inside our heart.

i relieved, i smile(:
my tears just stop when he said all the thing out.
because at least i knew he didnt change, or rather he change to a more mature thinking guy.

he didnt put relationship first at this time.
it good really, he know what is more important now.
i understand.

maybe i still stubborn wanting to put relationship first.

he said "deardear, dont treat bf too good, you will regret for sure."
i dont know.
i just know treating bf good is the must, i'll regret if i treat him bad.

we talk alot.

"deardear finally smile leh.."
"i know deardear will alway be strong de.."

i really love him alot, i dont know why.

he want to break with me is for my own good too.
he doesnt want me to use two years waiting for him, and i might lose alot of good chances.
or we might break after two years of waiting.
he doesnt want to have a gf when he enter NS.
he no time for me..

i feel like waiting for him..

he apologised for not being able to keep the promise.
he apologised, saying that we once said we wont be the one to say break first.
he swear and promised that he wont be the first to say break up.

but i knew it, he will be the first one.
its my intution.
i told him, i predict we going to break soon leh.

he asked when? is it today.
no, few days ago.
i dont know why, i just feel that we breaking soon.

its the same when my ex break with me.
i knew that he going to break with last time.
okay, that past.

darling, i really really trust you alot.
i hope all the things you told me is truth.

you said you wont go any find any girl anymore, you want to be alone.
okay, that sound really familar......

but i just choose to believe in you.
i want to wait.

i dont know what might happen in future.
maybe we will be together after two years, or maybe i have find myself a new boyfriend, or maybe neither of it.

you are not a bad guy really.
althought you hurt me, break promises and seperate with me..
but just that you got your difficulties..

but neverminds.
darling jiayou okay.
go for what you persuading now.
you alone alrdy, you can focus on what you want(:
will msg you when i miss you to let you happy okayyyyyyys.

iloveyou(:

p/s : i delet my previous post. that all craps and misunderstanding. lols.