pretend..

trying not to think anything..
been buried myself infornt of the computer the whole day.
watching online show continues for the whole day..
12hrs+

i dont want to think anything and smile.
but i really depressed.

he didnt message or called me for the whole day.
i really dont know why suddenly like that.
i been thinking hard, did i do anything wrong ?
it like out of the sudden.

he did msg me just now, but only a good night.
i damn sad =(
i didnt ask much.
i dont dare to ask what happening to him.
i just dont wish to know, i scared to see or heard the msg would be a bad ones.
just because i dont want to tears, i scared it will end.
i really tired, is it really difficult to make a relationship going on?

escaping from the reality, i really really dont want to know what happening.
choose to remain slient, choose not to ask anything, and replied "goodnight.."
i continued typing on "what happen to you le ?"
but i just delet away after writing..
pretend nothing is happening.

but i really very care about he, care about this relationship.
i even get worried, what happen to him that make him suddenly like that.
i want to treasure he, i tried my best in what i can do le.
but what i get is just nothing inthend..

prehaps i can get a answer soon.
i really hope so, hope he can tell me what going on.

sometimes, i do hope my intuition isnt so accurate.
is like so accurate and real can.
whatever i think or any things go through my mind.
IT WILL HAPPEN LOR=(
it like so so so so accurate.

it is fun sometimes luh, because whatever i think, then really happen.
but when come to some bad thing, really make me so sign. =(

e.g..
one week ago, feeling told me NO MATTER WHAT, THIS WEEKEND I WILL NOT MEET HIM SUCCESSFULLY.
no matter how he promised, how he asked me to trust him, i just feel that i cannot meet him.
and this will make it the fourth time he break promise.
i can even see the scenerio when the moment he said dont meet, will i be crying or will i too disappinted to just hack care anything. ?
okay, very stupid luhhhh.
but i dont know, it just come through my mind over and over =(
i trying hard to tell myself, we can meet de.

until sat, he said later meet what time and where.
i also feel that, we cant possible meet.
until i take my key and prepare to open the door.
he msg and said DONT MEET LER.
you know, how angry am i.
why this happen again?
i break down and cried so hard..

whatever.
i really hope he can tell me what going on, or what happening to he.

yes, i still love him, i do
love him alot alot alot.
but my love just dont seem to be appreciate.

:(

argh.
should i ask or wait ?

are we still together ?

did he still love me?

i feel everything is ending soon.
i really dont want this to happen=(
i seriously love him..

okok,
i shouldnt think so much ler.
dont think dont think.
slap myself.

let nature take it course.

nevermind, got good news ehh.
but i cant say.
roar.

someone XIN FU liao lor.
somemore, so cute and handsome sehhh.

cough cough.
didnt i said cannot say de.
oh whatever.

=/

i still so sad =(
why why why ?

dont care de luh.
try not to care anything.
dont think ler dont think ler.

gonna do my reflection now.
it 2.30am now.
havent even done my reflection yet.

i glad that from tomorrow onward.
CLASS WILL STARTING AT 3PM.
xD
happy happy.
can sleep late late ler (:

i found out that.
whenever my relationship was in the high point, yiting's will be in the low point.
then when i was in the low point, her's would be at the high point.

REALLY LORRRR.
EVERYTIME LIKE THAT.
ROARRRRRRRRRRRRR.
even yiting said so..
cant both of us together in the high point of relationship=/

ahhs, anyway
goodbyes!